She Meant More to Me Than I Ever Thought

It has been a rather, sad weekend for us Kadena High School c/o 2007 alumnus. We lost one of our own brightest, beautiful friends, Serena Swanland. God, I sound like I'm typing an article. I don't wanna sound like that, its too painful. She was one of my best friends without me even acknowledging it. I'm sure everybody else had time with her and really connected, but its painful for me because I woulda never thought that this tragic event could happen to somebody like her. So it was Friday morning, I woke up at 9:40am to my phone vibrating. Regina called my phone like 3 times. I called back like 5 minutes later and she told me that Serena passed. I was like wait, Sabrina?! She was like no, Serena...Serena Swanland. I was in disbelief...I couldn't...she said it had been on Facebook since that morning. She asked me if I was gonna be okay, I thought to myself, yeah I'll be okay...knowing I wasn't. I hung up and checked Facebook. I stopped what I was doing and broke down, crying like big tears...like I'm talking about the ones that I've been holding in for some years now. It hurt, it hurt bad and I didn't know that it would. When I was crying I was saying "Oh God...why her? Why do I feel this way? Why am I in pain?'. I had to call Regina back because I was gonna be hurt the whole day...she cheered me up some for the moment. I knew I had to talk to people from my class because I felt obligated to...I know they were hurting, especially the ones who were really close to her....Facebook's been pretty cold for the couple of days, we really can't fathom the whole thing because its so surreal. Some people talked to her the day before she was in the car accident. Its just been crazy, and depressin for the past couple days.

We were on the Panther Prowl together, she was the only other one who was in Journalism III with me. I remember when we were debating who should get Editor-In-Chief until Mrs. Mendoza made there be 4 EICs for different aspects of the paper. Junior year, when she signed my yearbook, I thought it was cool that she remembered the classes we were in together since freshmen year.

I'm not too sure how to end this blog, but continue to pray for us, her friends and family, as I will be doing the same. Thanks Serena, for the years that we had on Okinawa. I'm sure you're watching down on us now.

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#5 Visionary Unfinished Business Spring 09 OW-OW

Iota Phi Theta Fraternity Incorporated

It's Time

Well, I only got one thing to say: It is time. I'll see you when I see you, people. [Let's door slam behind me]

Freakin Budget Cuts Please

Yeah...so I was walkin back to my room from the bookstore today. Total of my books was like $369. Added a few stuff to make the total $414.something. That's like 5 books yo, mad heavy with a huge Obama poster. But anyway, I'm walkin back to my room and thinkin to myself. "Alright that's $414 minus the $750 that I put on my SpartanCard. That refund should be about $300, add that to $1500, but subtract the $500. How am I gonna manage all my other costs, like when I wanna buy food at school, knowing that every school purchase is like a bank robbery. What other times am I gonna actually use my card for snacks? Can that $300 last for the whole semester?" The whole thing like made me realize that I need to really put myself on a serious overseer budget. I have no income, I'm a freakin college student on scholarship. I can't live on scholarship forever now. Ya know, a few paying graphics but its not alot. I'm at a full ride with school but until I get myself off financial aid (no that's not a bad thing), I have to pay for school and probably won't have any room for refund checks. I can't depend on a refund check. Now I'm stable, I'm not saying I don't have money because I do. Its just no income flow. I got pretty much 2 years of school left and I'm not too into making money just yet. I'm glad I'm on scholarships and stuff but it can't be like this forever (duh, I'm not gonna be in school forever) Hmm...maybe I just needed that reality check. Last semester, financially was fine...its just that I used like all the money on my SpartanCard, on paraphenalia and of course, food. I can do better, and I'm going to. Let's get it.

Typical

Yeah Happy New Year and all that genre. I'm doing great by the way. Like, more than ever. I'm focused on a lot of stuff in life right now. Relationship wise...definetely single and not a man whore lol. Wish I had more to say but I really can't think of anything else. Stay...good?

Sick of Love Poetry

Yeah so its been a little while since I left somethin. Soo I'm actually posting one of my poems. Hell yeah I'm gettin it copyrighted and ish so no stealing...UNLESS you site me lol. Now, its spoken word so its better spoken [by the author]. But here we go. Its called "Sick of Love Poetry" and pretty much I'm doing a little downtalking love poetry.



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Sick of Love Poetry



I’m tired of my poetry people talkin bout love
Talkin how their love comes from above
Yeah I’m talkin to the ones who, call em back to remind themselves what the hell to do, when
They start to think then
Slow down like this to make the audience wish he wouldn’t stop now because I keep wishin how
Some of the poets and slowits seem to know its always easier to say “I love you”
Who can describe a billion ways to show the days that love is just a feeling, a healing from the pressure
From the pen in hand, a high demand of words that describe love,
Can’t get enough because the words are tripping and slipping away…

Start to burn this paper with the words I’m writin, not typin the pain I feel because
When I’m sick of love poetry, I just be hatin me, save it see, I can love dangerously
Because I would run out of words to say, the days get long and drawn out
That I don’t even realize what they be talkin about
Love is that feeling when you just have to write
Because its not in plain site or clear vision,
It’s the poets decision to invite you in their interpretated vision
But when I listen…

I get a new message from what they say, love
My head starts to hurt, love
Cuz what their sayin makes no sense, love…

Hm…next time you write love, make sure it’s the right love,
From the heart to the pen, stealin the words right out of my mouth
I’m about to drought and pout because
I have no means of understanding TRUE LOVE.

Can't Keep Up

Told you I can't keep up with this thing. Life only goes so fast.

Decision Made, Gotta Get Paid

Yeah see its been a while since I actually posted something up. Its finals week though. Anyway, I've finally decided on which fraternity I am going to pledge to. I mean I already knew since like the beginning of the semester but now its like finally on its dawn of approachal (the hell does that mean) soo now the dues gotta be paid off before I start the process. Oh and just for the disclaimer, its a fraternity in the National Pan-Helenic Council so its something waay legit, not any white fraternity or anything. Anyway, I'm ready...we had the big interest meeting and got a whole lotta insight. Only downfall is, that when I pledge, I'm not gonna be able to do the dorm step show. I wasn't aware that I'd be going through the process when all this is going on. I would probably cross when the dorm step team is actually singled out (number wise). I mean I'll be able to help but I would not be on the team nor in the show.

Pledging causes money though, yo. Money that I have, with a cushion. Only thing I'm sorta worried about is Christmas shopping. I mean I know my scholarships can help me out but I think that other cushion would be a little exhausted so pretty much I'm just workin out money a little bit...it'll work if I ever have to take out a loan though. So I know I'm straight.